"I am a part of all I have read"

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Today is the beginning of the last week of this great, relaxing break.  I have done almost everything I set out to do, except the bar prep part, which will be reserved for this last week.

I have finished The Happiness Project and Bonjour, Happiness!.  I have attempted 3 Julia Child's recipe . . . and failed 2.  I have started to read the last Shopaholic book of the series, Mini Shopaholic, and could not seem to enjoy the Becky Bloomwood I loved so much growing up - perhaps I have grown out of her . . . nonetheless I will try to finish it, although it's last on my list.  I am currently also reading Tout Sweet: Hanging up my High Heels for a New Life in France and Simple Abundance.

I knew I've been gaining weight, but it was not until I saw my wine country photos that I realized the excess chubbiness.  And so, I have decided to start on a strict detox diet program from another book, Yoga for Weight-Loss.  Today is day 1 and all I had for breakfast was hot water + lemon, and a small bowl of organic, sugar-free cereal + nonfat soy milk.  Although it's a 28 day program, my goal is to at least make it through 1 week before school starts next week.  I'm feeling a little droopy from caffeine withdrawal already.

Last week, I found an old book in my old boxes called Simple Abundance.  I bought this book back in elementary school or Jr. High at a local library's used bookstore.  It reminded me of my weekend trips to the library, attempting to read every book on each shelf.  I even had a notebook of all the books I read with ratings and reviews.  I remember befriending the old woman in the bookstore who also shared with me her log of books she had read.  I remember reading so many self-help books and accumulating all the quotes I loved and still love.  Ah, I was such an old soul. . .

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I decided that I've been reading so many happiness books, I should give this particular book a try.  On the very first page I had inscribed my name in a hot pink gel pen.  I guess my signature always had a heart in it.

Upon reading the first couple pages I felt the power of these old words.  It felt even more nostalgic seeing my old highlighting of the passages that still spoke to me over 10 years later. . . I can now see that this book was really the original for all the modern books that I've been reading.  In The Project Happiness, the author talked about a play called "The Blue Bird," where 2 children spent a year searching the world for the blue bird of happiness, only to find it waiting for them when they return home.  In Simple Abundance, the author talked about a famous Victorian lecture called "Acres of Diamonds" where a farmer sold his farm to travel the world in search of a particular diamond.  He died never finding these riches, but the farmer that bought his farm, who cultivated and appreciated it for its beauties, ended up discovering a diamond mine (literally).  Reflecting on these cliche anecdotes, I too have been searching on the web and in bookstores for all these books to buy about inner happiness.  I have spent so much money and time on these books with cute covers, just to feel unsatisfied with the substance inside.  Who would have thought that the book I was hoping for, to fill that void, cost me $1 over a decade ago and was collecting dust in a box.