Bummed.

So I've been waiting for the results of Law Review and today was supposed to be THE day that invitations get emailed out. . . I couldn't sleep last night because I was so anxious. I kept refreshing my email the whole day today to see if there were any signs. . . it's 7:25pm. . . the end of today. . . still no email. Since class ended I've been studying the whole time for the last 3 hours. . . the feeling of defeat is slowly eating me inside and I'm trying hard to focus on what's important at hand: BTI homework. . .

I'm only human, so I can only put up with the nonchalance for so long. I know I can't win every battle I jump into. Every victory my heart beats as though it were on the verge of an attack. Every defeat it drops out of my chest on the verge of death. It's so hard to maintain neutrality, you know?

Well, right now it's currently feeling major defeat. There's a spark of hope that I'll get an invitation later tonight and if I'm lucky, a second-hand invitation tomorrow. However, I'm trying to slowly cope with it so I can start fresh tomorrow and not let it weigh me down. It's not the end of the world- there are other means of getting my foot in the door for jobs and it doesn't always mean having Law Review on my resume right? That can't be the make-all, break-all. I can't always push myself over the edge after result.

. . . Just got news that Frankie (family dog) just died. . . wow. Okay I am moping over all the wrong things.

Bye.